Do you ever find yourself uttering the same prayer over and over? For me, it’s a simple prayer: Lord, give me a heart for people who don’t know Jesus. Why do I keep returning to this same prayer? Because my heart is often not where it needs to be. I find myself too comfortable in this world and too concerned with things that don’t really matter. Or I look at my life and realize that I am surrounded by Christians with very little interaction with unbelievers. I continue to utter this prayer because I believe that Jesus Christ is the only hope this world has, and I have a responsibility to share the good news with the unbelievers in my life. I pray this simple prayer because I know that God loves sinners, and I want to love them too.
Recently, as I was reading the opening pages of The Pilgrim’s Progress for the hundredth time, God began to convict my heart. More clearly than ever before, I noticed that Christian (the main character of Part One) was not only burdened by his own sinfulness, but also in deep anguish at his families’ lostness. Desperately wanting his wife and children to leave their sinfulness, Christian pours out his heart:
“O my dear wife,” said he, “and you the Children of my bowels, I your dear friend am in myself undone, by reason of a Burden that lieth hard upon me: mereover [sic], I am for certain informed, that this our City will be burned with fire from Heaven; in which fearful overthrow, both myself, with thee my wife, and you my sweet babes, shall miserably come to ruin, except (the which yet I see not) some Way of escape may be found, whereby we may be delivered.”
John Bunyan, The Pilgrim’s Progress, pg. 1-2.
Christian is not only broken because of his own lostness; he is in anguish because he knows his wife and children are lost too. Because of the burden (sin) he is carrying, he knows he must escape the ruin that is coming upon everyone in the City of Destruction, but he is painfully aware that his family needs to escape the coming judgment too. But there’s a problem.
His family does not share the same urgency as him. They feel no burden on their back; they fear no coming ruin. They assume “some frenzy distemper had got into his head” (2). Hoping to snap him out of it, his wife and children turn to chiding, deriding, and even neglecting him (2). The more Christian pleads with them, the more their hearts are hardened.
Maybe you have been in a similar situation before. After being saved or convicted of the need to tell others about Jesus you begin joyfully sharing the good news with parents, siblings, children, co-workers, and friends. But they don’t share your same enthusiasm. In fact, they almost seem annoyed. It’s disheartening to witness people rejecting the One who came to die for them over and over, especially when it’s people we care about.
Despite the way they treat him, Christian doesn’t give up on his family. He continues to pray and pity them. But after meeting a man named Evangelist, Christian learns how he can have the burden removed off his back and escape judgment, and so, he takes off running, away from his family and the City of Destruction. We might wonder whether Christian has given up on his wife and children. Has he lost all hope that they would be saved? Has he possibly grown calloused towards them after all of their insults and stubbornness?
If I am honest, there have been times when I became exceedingly frustrated at friends and coworkers because they stubbornly refused to even listen to my pleas. I loved them; I was patient; I wasn’t pushy. But after a while, I wanted to just give up, not because I didn’t love them, but because it’s painful to know that Jesus is what they needed, and yet, they choose to reject Him.
As I thought about Christian’s decision to leave his family, I wondered what was going through his head. Thankfully, John Bunyan tells us later on in the story. Here is dialogue between Christian and a character named Charity.
Bunyan, The Pilgrim’s Progress, 52.
- Charity: And why did you not bring them along with you?
- Weeping, Christian said: Oh! how willingly would I have done it! but they were all of them utterly averse to my going on Pilgrimage.
- Charity: But you should have talked to them, and have endeavoured to have shown them the Danger of being behind.
- Christian: So I did; and told them also what God had shewed to me of the destruction of our City; but I seemed to them as one that mocked, and they believed me not.
- Charity: And did you pray to God that he would bless your Counsel to them?
- Christian: Yes, and that with much Affection; for you must think that my Wife and poor Children were very dear unto me.
- Charity: But did you tell them of your own Sorrow, and Fear of Destruction? For I suppose that destruction was visible enough to you?
- Christian: Yes, over, and over, and over. They might also see my Fears in my Countenance, in my Tears, and also in my trembling under the apprehension of the Judgment that did hang over our heads; but all was not sufficient to prevail with them to come with me.
- Charity: But what could they say for themselves why they came not?
- Christian: Why, my Wife was afraid of losing this World; and my Children were given to the foolish Delights of Youth: So what by one thing and what by another, they left me to wander in this manner alone.
Can you sense the great sorrow and unceasing anguish that Christian has for his family? Can you hear the pain and bitterness in his voice as he reflects on having to leave them?
As I read these pages, God got my attention. I began to cry out once again, Lord give me a heart for those who don’t know You! Lord, let me feel great sorrow and unceasing anguish for those who are lost until I moved to action!
Christians have experienced the salvation of the Lord. We have been rescued out of darkness and brought into His marvelous light. God has made us alive in Jesus. We are forgiven, made new, and graced with eternal life. But have these gospel realities created in our hearts a passion to see the lost saved?
Do we have the same deep, unceasing anguish for the lost as Christian did? Not just for our family, but for all unbelievers. Do we weep over their hard hearts? Do we pray with much affection that God would unveil the gospel so that they might see “the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ” (2 Cor. 4:4)? Do we plead with them over and over and over to believe as we tremble at the judgment that awaits them? Do we reason with them so that they might understand that the world and the foolish delights of our youth are empty?
What if our answer to these questions is “no”? What if our heart is not broken for the lost like it should be? What if you are like me and find yourself more concerned with being comfortable than bold and faithful? Is there anything we can do to be moved to great sorrow and unceasing anguish for the lost? I believe there is.
First, ask God to change your heart. We regularly ask God to bring healing, guard us from temptations, and lead us in paths of righteousness. Can’t we also trust God to bring our hearts in line with His? We know that God “desires all people to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth” (1 Tim. 2:4). If you find that your heart towards the lost has grown cold or that you struggle to boldly share the gospel, shouldn’t your first step be to ask God to give you a great sorrow and unceasing anguish for the lost so that you are moved to action? It is God who can get our attention and God who can soften our hearts for unbelievers.
Second, remember who you were before Christ saved you. The more Christian was convicted of his own pitiful state as a sinner, the more he felt pity for his family’s helpless state. As Christians, sometimes we forget that we were once lost and helpless apart from Christ. We forget that we use to reject the gospel. The further we move away from the day God saved us, the easier it can be for us to forget what it was like to be lost. When we forget what it was like to be lost, we will struggle to have a sense of urgency to reach the lost with the hope of the gospel. Remembering who we were before Christ and recalling God’s graciousness in saving us can light a fire in our hearts for the lost and give us an unbreakable hope that God still saves.
If we want to faithfully and passionately share the hope of the gospel for the rest of our lives, we need God to work in our hearts and to give us a great sorrow and unceasing anguish for the lost. We need to be so moved by God’s glory and the desperate state of the lost that we take hold of every opportunity to tell others about Jesus. It’s not just some feeling that you and I can muster up; it’s a conviction, a commitment, ultimately, a work that God must do in our hearts.
*John Bunyan, The Pilgrim’s Progress (Reprint; Uhrichsville, OH: Barbour Publishing, 1985).
